Of all fruits am going bananas. Yes and its sad for they are such sweet yellow things. I think it ought to be bitterball or blackberries (don’t tell me they are sweet too….?) I have got my boss hollering down the phone…(reminds me of those days when people held phones with big sticks and had to literally shout down at whoever it was they were talking to )but back to the public P.A system of a boss I was fortunate enough to end up with,he wanted me to pick him watermelon juice(he had got out all axes in a serious bid to cut weight)and a perfume VP 2*2 at that sad struggling and forgive me if I leave out awful supermarket Life. To some sad poet this would be a morning with the sun gleefully smiling on the horizon and kissing our already sun kissed skin. I wonder how someone can totally get wrapped up in such a dreamy world they fail to notice,the heat,the sweat to us who are walking. Am rambling and am going to blame that pregnant wife of mine who has been such an effective teacher, ever complaining……I barely had time to realise I had reached the entrance to the market when the security man asks me to leave my briefcase. Now I have more than five replies for the dude but I decide not to reply but open my brifecase to show off the wad of dollars I had to take to that shabby forex bureau ,and a month of paperwork at which point the poor sob remembered to “sir” me with an impish grin that I ached to slap off that face swathed in wrinkles. I just headed for that watermelon juice for the “cut-weight-project” though honestly if I were in his shoes I would go for liposuction or surgery. His belly was on a steady marathon to his toes. I also picked out that perfume he so wanted VP 2*2 when next to it I saw a cologne…which was probably new on the market but I had no cologne and was dripping with sweat. It was in a black glass bottle. It was Negativity. with a few shillings to spare(times are hard) sweaty from my rush,I went to the mens and had a dash of Negativity on me so I didn’t take the sweaty smell to office. I hailed a taxi which came and with the way I was dressed and where I work I couldn’t haul my being in the behind trunk so I sat in front and instantly regretted it.
From my wife Lynette and her protruding belly, going on and on about that nice but ridiculously priced land in Takkajunge(I chose to call the place TK) which currently stood in the way of my own drive. I had to use public transport everyday(yeah I know……I too wonder who taught her algebra),to becoming an errand boy even though I was a junior associate at the firm to a boss who had the vocals of Goliath, I had to suffer the cheap scent this lady(girl)was wearing. Seeing her reminded me of someone I once knew who wanted more teenage years than God had on offer. In a flimsy see through top, spotted bra (it was visible and I aint blind)and a really short skirt that put on exhibition legs that would have been nice hadn’t they been baboon hairy and spotted thighs(I bet she didn’t even know the spelling of beauty spa). 15 minutes and I mercifully alighted off and made a bee line for the building were I worked. The Askari hollered a greeting to which I replied ‘yeah yeah’ and he smiled.That for some reason irked me and I reached my boss’s office without greeting my co-workers. They didn’t mind and that too irked me a lot. My boss was happy to see me “Good morning Gideon” “nya nya nya nya nya” I went on in my head and that’s the only thing that triggered the smile he got. This prototype of Michelin toons thought I was happy that he had sent me to pick juice and perfume for him on a sweltering hot morning. Oh Uganda……may God surely uphold thee.